I have a feeling I might end up like this chick tonight – wearing nothing but my panties and dancing on the poker table. With a beer in one hand, of course. I feel like drinkin’!

Wish me luck, I’ve been knocked down to third place and I badly need a win!

About a week ago I read on an industry blog about a politician’s wife being outed as a porn star. The first thing I thought was “wow, I wonder if that’s so-and-so from DC”. When I lived there, it was not at all unusual to meet politicians, career military, law enforcement, etc. in the swing scene. Generally, swingers are a more educated, more savvy, more well-traveled bunch than the general population … and DC is the mecca of upper-echelon public servants.

So of course I went to read the article and see if I knew who it was about.

I didn’t – the story wasn’t even from DC but from Fort Myers, FL. And now its all over the news. First, the outing. And now, the firing. I’m sure you’ve all heard that the town manager was fired in a unanimous city council vote. Not because of anything he’s done or not done, not because of his job performance, but because his wife was outed as a porn star.

How fucking ridiculous is the mentality of the general population in this country? This guy has a long and, by all reports, successful career as a town manager, but because his wife does porn he no longer has a job?

Huh. How many hookers does Silvio Berlusconi, the Italian Prime Minister, party with on a regular basis? And the Italian people love him! (I love him! … for the hookers anyway, I have no clue what his politics actually are

It is so disgustingly sad that once a person is associated with sex work in this country, they are effectively banished from the main.

I’ve been wondering for a while now what my future holds for me. I have a bachelors degree in English Literature with a minor in Biology. Before I got into porn I worked in a variety of jobs – from medical technician in surgical research to reporter/researcher to manuscript evaluator to public relations for a major television network. I left my last full-time job over 14 years ago – I was planning on spending the extra time writing, but as things would have it the site ended up being a full-time job for me.

Over the last 14 years I’ve gone through periods where I’ve been bored with the site, and have taken on a couple other jobs – mainly just to keep my brain occupied. I was a freelance radio news reporter for a couple of years and I was hired as marketing manager for a dealership here in town. I HATED the dealership job, and quit after about eight months. The news job I really enjoyed. It paid crap, but I enjoyed interviewing the sheriff, the councilmen, the supervisors, the town manager (yup, just like the guy who got fired). I enjoyed having my finger on the pulse of the community. I enjoyed knowing what was going on and letting everyone else know what was going on. And I have to admit it was really cool to hear myself on the radio every day

But then one day the owner of the radio network decided to run for state congress, and I was summarily fired. Not because I’d done a bad job. Not because there had ever been any complaints. Quite the contrary – not long after I started, my boss was getting all sorts of complimentary calls about me. It was because I was also doing porn ($10/story doesn’t cover the rent!) and he needed me off his payroll before he ran. It was a preemptive strike on his part. He knew when he hired me that I had my site and that it was fairly successful and popular for what it was. He wasn’t worried about it … until he thought others might be looking into his business.

So there I went.

Now, as I get closer to 40 every year, I wonder what the future holds for me. With my own experience, and reading about things like the Fort Myers incident, I can’t say that its looking all that rosy. I don’t want to be in front of a camera when I’m 50 years old. Kudos to the ladies who do (some of them are really good friends), but I just don’t think its for me.

But I worry about what that leaves me with. With a couple exceptions, I’ve been running a porn site for the last 14 years. Is it even possible to put that in a resume in such a way that it won’t send prospective employers running in the other direction? Could I ever go back to a mainstream career? Or have I painted myself into a corner? Is Porn the end of the line?

1. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed?

Is bukakke a group masturbation party? Traditionally, the girl just sits there and the guys all wack off on her face. Sounds like group masturbation to me. Not only have I attended, but I’ve hosted Love ‘em!!

2. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or?

I stimulate myself until I cum – harder and faster, faster, faster until the explosion. Then I massage myself VERY gently as the spasms subside.

3. Have you ever video’ed yourself while masturbating (solo)? Where are they now?

Hmmm … only once a week Almost all of my camz shows are solo masturbation shows (except when I (too rarely) have another girl or a guy join me – LIKE ON THURSDAY when April comes over with her sybian – you guys won’t want to miss this show!!!!) I keep all the video archived in the member’s area of my site. Here’s a capture from one of my recent shows (which is uploading to my site as we speak!). Its not the best pic of me masturbating – I was nowhere near ready to cum yet, and I think some guy in the chat just told a joke. But I wanted to post something with just the hands, as that is my preferred masturbatory technique, and when I was really getting into it during this particular show I was actually fucking myself with a beer bottle

4. Have you ever look at porn online? Have you ever posted porn online?

Duh. Don’t think I need to answer this one

5. Do you send/recieve dirty email jokes and pictures?

Not really. Every now and then one of my friends will send me a dirty joke or photo, but I don’t pass them along or send out jokes/pics of my own. There’s enough dumb email going around without passing along the spam. I have, though, been one of those dirty jokes. I’m pretty sure this picture was passed around EVERYWHERE. This must have been taken from some dude in the crowd – we have a very similar pic but my camera-guy was at a slightly different angle. Remember this? Yup, that slut is me! (But it was in a bar, not out on the street).

Bonus: Have you ever told someone they were good in bed when they weren’t?

The very first guy I ever slept with. Didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

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So, in other news … had a fun but relatively tame weekend. Spent Saturday poolside with my friends and their family. One of my good friend’s little dogs died, and he was having a memorial. Pretty much the only memorial part of it was when we’d all do a shot and toast to Squish. Otherwise, we had fun swimming and drinking and eating and hanging out. Like we always do

I spent Sunday laying in bed reading a book and whining about my hangover. Like I usually do

Worked all day yesterday, posting photos for links, answering email, paying bills (ick), editing pics for a Kinky Kacey update (she hasn’t had an update in a while – my bad). Walked the dog last night just after sunset and it was still too friggin’ hot. We only did about two miles around the neighborhood but by the time we were done he’d wilted and when we got in he drank an entire bowl of water. Tough enough to deal with the heat out here when you AREN’T wearing a fur coat. I’m not sure how I’m going to exercize him for the rest of the summer. It is just too hot. Forecast at 119 today and it’ll either stay this hot or even get hotter as we move into August. Pretty sure we had a least one or two 129 days last summer.

So, because of the heat I sucked it up and got a gym membership this morning. Not that I don’t like the gym, but running on the island with my dog in the mornings is just SO MUCH NICER than running inside on a treadmill with a bunch of sweaty people and a TV in your face. But, gotta do what you’ve gotta do, I guess. Probably won’t be able to run outside again ’til mid-September. My poor boy sat in the livingroom window with his nose sticking out the blinds watching me leave this morning and wondering why he didn’t get to go too. Morning runs were our own little ritual. It was so sad

I don’t know how much work I’ll get done today … I’ve got a camz archive on its way, then I’m going to get some lunch. Hubby was talking about taking the boat out this afternoon but I’m not sure if thats going to happen, or if it does, what time. He helped some friends move last night and if they finish up today then we’ll all go out and cool off. We’ll end the evening at the tiki bar (pull the boat right up on the beach for dinner, drinks, some trivia and maybe even some swingers!!

Lifestyle Lounge does a swinger convention/vacation here in Havasu every year and the last couple of years they’ve hosted it at our favorite lakeside resort (and the place we play trivia every Tuesday night). Its not supposed to start ’til tomorrow, but a good friend of ours was bartending down there yesterday and he called to tell us the swingers were already starting to show up. Sweet! We are SO going to crash their parties!!

We’ll be out looking for them tonight, and maybe even hit up the lake tomorrow. Can’t go out on Thursday since I have my camz show (the one with April & the Sybian!) at 4:00 pm, but we’ll be out partying on Friday and Saturday for sure. I MUST go out to wally-world and get myself a new little camera (mine broke camping a couple weekends ago) so I can take lots of pics on the lake. Swingers don’t generally like to have pictures taken of them, so I’ll have to be discreet about it Anything I get, I’ll be posting to the O Live Page, so be sure to stay tuned!!